Sunday, May 8, 2011

A story of moms ...are you one?

I hear a little voice say, "Mom, I made you breakfast in bed!" I look at the clock it is 7:00 AM. I am presented with a bowl of cereal on a wooden tray. Next I hear the story of the preparation: “I snuck down the stairs so you would not hear me, and moved the stool to reach the cereal. This was the only cereal I could reach...I was so afraid you heard the stool move...and I used the bathroom downstairs so you would not wake up with the flush, the flush is so loud, I really really wanted to surprise you mom! Were you surprised? Oh...I spilled the milk, just a little bit, but I did it all myself, and I snuck back up carrying the bowl of cereal and then I found the tray upstairs and put the bowl on the tray, and brought it in to you." It is now 7:02, she is smiling quite contentedly, and I am enjoying this bowl of cereal. This is the best bowl of Trader Joe's High Fiber cereal ever! And I tell her that too, along with how surprised I am. Oh, she says she has another surprise...the card she made at school. Downstairs she goes to find it, daddy follows to help her. Next a little paper bag is placed on the tray and hidden inside is the book mark she made for me and the card she constructed at school. Both are perfect, she is my daughter of course. She jumps into bed and crawls over me, with her elbows pointed just the right way so I know it is her, I do not flinch, (but I am screaming inside, imagine a nuggie on your shin bone), "Mom I want to snuggle with daddy right now," "No problem," I say as I wrap my arm around her too. Back to sleep.

But prior to today, I am reading about President Obama's mom. The writer of the article makes the point that being a mom takes courage...and I am thinking about this now.  Who are all these courageous mothers I know? What makes them courageous, and often times selfless? Good mom's are a rare breed, but I know a whole bunch of them, perhaps you do to. What makes each one courageous....?

Grandmamma Margo, has five children under five by the time she is 26 years old. No family here in California, living in a land of a different language, and somehow she does it all (and still lives to tell about it, although the trauma of it all reduces her detailed memories into stories we all love to hear.) Mommy Lis, has two grown up kids in college, they love her deeply and you know it when they talk about their mom. In her spare time she helps start a health care clinic on an elementary school campus, initiates a study and eventual program to combat iron deficiency utilizing a cast iron pan, and fresh vegetables.... and well, everyone loves Mommy Lis, but she never brags about her many accomplishments, so I just did! Auntie Julie, passes the bar, and ends up working in health care law at the university level in the midst of raising two brilliant girls and one smart son, all the while keeping her sense of integrity and justice. She encourages her children in the desires of their hearts, and in that way is a great gift to each one. Bottom line, Auntie Julie creates space for her children to be themselves, one a college student, the other a 1st year cadet in the coast guard and the third, a high school student finding his gift in sailing. Auntie Eve, she is the first of our brood to have kids. She is also the first to have children graduated from college too. One is an architect, and enjoying her craft, while the other graduates in May, with a vision of service to those about her. Two different children, applying their talents in different ways, still both the same mom. That is what is so wonderful about moms, we have to learn to recognize the uniqueness of our children and encourage them in their talents. Then there is Auntie Cori, to many she is Dr. Cori, providing incite to other mom's and dads too, about the health of their child. Heck she provides me with lots of incite to my Margo...but when you meet Auntie Cori, she is very down to earth and easy to hang out with. She encourages her kids in all of their activities, it could be hockey, lacrosse or hip hop dancing for her teenage son; ballet, tap, and piano for her littlest one, and that continued support for her college kid, on the synchronized swim team. She works lots of hours every week, even though she says she is on a reduced schedule, and her down time, is with her kids too. You mom's all know about that, our down time is with our kids whether we work or stay at home, somehow it becomes all about our kids. How many miles do you drive each week to ensure your child gets all the activity and life skills involvement they need?

I have another friend with three children, all playing soccer; all on different practice schedules and game times...her husband is a triathlete and practices too. But she does it all, and enjoys her craft of photography and writing. Moms are creative! We have to be! There is no way to be a mom without being creative, what about you, what is your creative solution to school projects, kiddy arguments, and even just serving a meal everyone will eat and even enjoy? I have mom friends who are nurses, and work like crazy caring for patients all day or night, and then come home to care for their children. They even want to keep growing as a person, it is not enough to just make it through the day for them, and in reality it is not enough for any of us mom's to just make it through the day. We are too valuable for that.

I know some moms who adopt to enhance their momminess, or actually their hearts just expand to include others into the family. That is a mommy reaching across an ocean to a little one in a far off land. These mom's have hope for their native born children and those that were birthed into their family through the slow process of paperwork, waiting, more paperwork and waiting again, and then suddenly it is time to go and pick up your child and bring them home. These moms literally expand their borders, and I know more than a few who inspire me with their love and making the family work and grow.

And then I think about all the moms, and I know there are many, who walk through the financial land minds of this current economy and make life happen at home and for others. I truly hope their kids and husbands one day understand all the comfort and wisdom they bring into their daily lives just with the simple wisdom of stretching the dollar for a birthday, or family fun night. Moms don't stop the fun because life is more than a bit stressful, moms don't cave because the world of finance is bouncing all around in fear, these moms move forward and make life better. You moms know who you are, take a big bow.

I know some moms just find out their husbands are laid off, or his pay check is cut, or some other stressful thing is happening at his work. And these moms come up with ways to encourage their hubbies even in the midst of these difficult times. These moms are worth their weight in gold and diamonds...I bet you are one of those moms...are you?

Moms are courageous, moms are brave, and even when we make mistakes, we grow, and learn. And moms, well we have the best seat in the house to enjoy the moments of our children as they grow...we just need to remember to be present to that moment. Remember moms, "your value is greater than rubies"...when my daughter reads that in another mother days card she makes for me she asks, "Mom, am I more valuable than that?" "Oh yes Margo, you are more valuable than rubies, back then that was like gold, you are more valuable than millions of dollars." She is quiet, and then speaks up saying, "Mom I am more valuable than infinity rubies and dollars, more than infinity." She gets it!  And I hope each mom that reads this post finds they are more valuable than infinity rubies too, because moms just are!

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